Photo by Sierra Koder on Unsplash

There are a thousand reasons for a divorce, but if you deep-dive, there is (perhaps) none.

But one thing is for sure, countries with regimented social norms have a lower proportion of divorce. According to the most recent data, the Maldives has the highest divorce rate globally, with 5.52 divorces per 1,000 people.  Conversely, Sri Lanka records the lowest divorce rate, at 0.15 divorces per 1,000 people. In India, the divorce rate is notably low, estimated at around 1% of marriages ending in divorce.  This low rate is often attributed to cultural norms and societal attitudes discouraging divorce.

Ending a marriage peacefully is a difficult proposition—an almost impossible and improbable thought.

However, I have attempted to delve into the subject assuming that the couple is eager to part ways peacefully. The keywords here are part ways and peacefully. 

Here you go:

1. Stay calm: in the worst situations, we tend to shoot our decibels as well as our blood pressure. Easier said than done, but we have to practice it-stay calm. Count 10 before flaring up and it will work. Even if your partner is shouting, stay calm. Soon you will find your partner giving away.
2. Discuss the problems: there is a saying: ‘If you have not found a solution for a problem, you haven’t understood the problem’. Try to list out the problems and try to find a solution for each of the listed problems. You may (perhaps) laugh at the list of the problems that you two have identified. You may (or may not) find them silly and laughable.
3. Stop blaming: once you have identified the problems, identify the one between the two of you who is more likely the key stakeholder or you may find both are the contributors. Own up, if it is genuinely identified.
4. Discuss in public places: never discuss your problems within the four walls of your home. Go to a coffee shop (not a pub/bar) and discuss the issues. You’ll discuss more and fight less
5. Never^∞ discuss anything in front of the children: believe in me, they will be traumatized for life. It’ll leave behind a deep scar, and you won’t like it either.
6. Seek therapy: professional help may add a spark that you were looking for as a catalyst. You must have the first meeting together, and the subsequent meetings could be solo.
7. Try to be together: try to hang around together, even if you hate to be together. It may take all the grievances out. Staying away will not help in parting ways
8. Plan your divorce: sit down like two mature people and chalk out the post-divorce plan together related to child support, finances, and property division under the supervision of a professional
9. Revisit nostalgia: visit places that you two used to visit in your heydays to bring back good memories. It may arouse lost emotions
10. Move forward: don’t dig into the past. Look into the future. if you have children, think about the ways to minimize their trauma

I sincerely feel if a couple follows these steps (religiously), they may end up not ending their marriage.